The year 2020 is almost over and this is the perfect way we should end this challenging year.
This year was special because unlike every year this wasn’t about achievements, hollow “resolutions” and regrets. It hit each of us like a “baseball bat in the face” lesson; painful and life changing. Weird analogy? Always!
Many people have already begun a list of things they will be “doing” in 2021, my advice — don’t
There are only 2 things you should do, one is given away in the title and you will find the second at the end. Let’s begin,
There is a difference between knowing and realization. During the journey of our life, we just live through knowing so many things, but hardly realizing them. Realization feels like a spark, the light bulb over the head moment as perfectly shown in cartoons.
I had such a realization, although I always knew this and used this as an introspection process; the realization made it absolutely delicious.
A little back story
Some time ago I took a freelancing job as a content writer. This company’s target audience was a certain demographic of people and the content was to be created accordingly. I wrote a motivational story for a segment adapted from a true story and everything went through another person, who had known this industry for some time.
This beautiful story was loved by everyone who read it, even strangers. But unfortunately that person didn’t see that. Imagine every possible excuse not to publish a story and this person had it (excuses, not valid points). But the most bizarre one was “People might be offended”
My eyes popped out in the fourth dimension (not in this one, whew!) how can people be offended by a motivational story? It doesn’t have anything to be offended about, it’s just a sweet story about staying strong amidst life’s hardships.
Note: This is not a debate about whether this person was right or wrong. But they had no valid point to back their reason.
While they took pride in being experienced in this field, I am humble to have the knack of knowing people, their truths behind the realistic masks they masquerade with.
But all this to and fro aside, a realization hit me. The person wasn’t willing to publish that story because a part of them was defensive about it. Some hurt part rejected the opportunity to heal and release the struggle. Sadly, she thought this group of people that she studied, might feel the same way. She refused to bring a tiny speck light that would make someone feel better. Irrational? Absolutely.
I shared this personal segment of my life with you to pose some important questions which you must ask yourself, the most inner part of yourself while being completely alone in a closed room. So you have no excuse of distraction.
Are you giving excuses to hold onto your resentments?
Are you replaying an old story of hurt and loss because it’s too big to let go off?
Why are we justifying our resentments?
Why are we full of excuses to throw around every time we are given an opportunity to heal?
Who will you be without this story?
I began to see this person’s similarity in various people around me. Each with a different excuse to hold resentment which they kept close to their heart. Should you be holding resentment that close to you? Do you know that might be the quickest way to have heart disease or cancer?
Trauma is a part of life, some hardships leave a mark on the “skin” of our life and that’s okay. But what’s not okay is repeating that story in your mind again and again and hurting yourself. Are you telling this story as a victim or as a fighter? Or worse as a fighter with resentment?
The truth was out in 2020. The façade, the pretense, and the wounds everything was transparent. There were those who refused to have any real connection and there were those who formed meaningful ones.
Resentment is NOT the baggage who should be carrying in this new year and if you think you don’t have any, check again please.
The lesson from 2020 was to STOP rushing through life. SLOW DOWN. If you plan on “rushing” in 2021 you didn’t learn the lesson.
In this new year you should,
Love deeply and fiercely
Express what you really feel
Hold and hug your loved ones every chance you get
And if you don’t get chances, make them!
Let go of all trash (people, objects, messy feelings etc.)
This challenging year has us yearning for real connection, deep love, genuine support, respect and nourishment. Say ‘yes’ to all that you desire.
2020 was the year we had to let go and 2021 will be the year we regain our true authentic self but only if we are willing to change the old way of being.
I will see you next year hopefully with more joy, love and peace in each one of our lives
Until next time,
Sangmitra
